Friday, March 9, 2012

Chapter Two

So here we are. 
This is the second installment in my blackout poem series. 
This is the second time I've tried to write this post. 
The first time I kept backspacing, rewriting.... It just didn't feel right. I wasn't ready. I couldn't find a way to say what I wanted to say, it felt untrue, and I just got really frustrated and sleepy, so I went to bed.
 A lot has changed in the short time since the 28th of January. 
I've had some triumphs, I've had some failures, there's been plenty of disappointment, and more reminders that life is unfair. 
I've had my fun and I've played some games. I've gone back and forth, but I've made some decisions. 
And while there are still many words unsaid and decisions left unmade, and the decisions that have been made aren't necessarily final, I'm happy to leave them that way....
I suppose they'll all join me somewhere along the way...
Because I think that now I can safely say - I am ready to open Chapter Two.

The impact has been made, my choices and experiences will follow me, but I'm curious to see how the rest of 2012 will shape my story.

It's never to late to start something new. 
Whenever you're ready chapter two is waiting for you.

An Anecdote

Scene: Dining room table. 
Mom: Flipping through seed catalog. 
Me: Glued to Pinterest. 
*Starts to quietly sing* 'I remember, I remember when I lost my mind.... There was something so pleasant about that place... Even your emotions have an echo In so much space.... And I think it's crazy... Yeah I think you're crazy...' 
Mom interrupts: Where did you get that song? 
Me: It's 'Crazy' by Gnarls Barkley.... Look. *Plays song on laptop* 

30 seconds later.... 

Mom picks up seed catalog and leaves room. 
Me: Wait are you leaving because of the song?
Mom: ...... no.......

I love my mom. :)